six months on
September 2008 
March wrap
Posted on Mar 31st, 2008
by 
caewyn springwitch
caewyn springwitch
Wrapping up March in a box tying it with a big daffodil coloured bow and then consigning it to the archive in my head.
Six months on from a drastic life change, I'm still unsure as to how to proceed. It's now spring and the longer days make a difference, I need some sunshine, some vit d, my brain needs a springclean too.
I like to plan, to have order even if it is chaotic order it helps me, but last night I had a sense of just floating in a void of nothingness it scared me. There didn't seem anything to hold on to, I couldn't see what was real and what wasn't, it wasn't panic I felt, just dread feeling of being alone.
Surprisingly, I slept really well after this episode and felt fine in the morning but now, where to now?
Must take a break, too much thinking.
Six months on from a drastic life change, I'm still unsure as to how to proceed. It's now spring and the longer days make a difference, I need some sunshine, some vit d, my brain needs a springclean too.
I like to plan, to have order even if it is chaotic order it helps me, but last night I had a sense of just floating in a void of nothingness it scared me. There didn't seem anything to hold on to, I couldn't see what was real and what wasn't, it wasn't panic I felt, just dread feeling of being alone.
Surprisingly, I slept really well after this episode and felt fine in the morning but now, where to now?
Must take a break, too much thinking.
Access: PublicTagged with: Six months on
Caewyn,
I love the way you weave the natural world into your blog.
It sounds as though you disidentified with the Ego/Thinking Mind as would be described just this way by Eckhart Tolle. This is good. It is OK not to have “something” to hold on to, better really. Now you can flow with “what is”, with reality as it unfolds. That is all any of us can do, though many believe they can control such. These live in a future that never comes. Better to live in a NOW that is. Also, not good, to dwell on the past, for you can not live there. It was what it was and mostly it is subjective because few ever really see the past exactly as it occured.
So - get out and enjoy the sunshine when it comes. The daffodils are blooming madly here and I love them so “Daffodils, daffodils - yellow flowers that bloom in the chill. February's cold, March winds, April rain - Daffodils. Gone again, back next year, full of cheer - Daffodils”. Let them cheer your eyes and, through your senses, your soul.
Yes, most of us do too much thinking of a repetitive, non-productive nature. It is very hard to stop it but it can be done. If you haven't done so already, read Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now and A New Earth. You will find you are in good company. 2 million people spanning the entire globe are learning simulataneously to quiet the thinking mind and convert it into the tool it was meant to be. Never was it intended to dominate our lives as it does for most of humanity.
Wishing you clear, bright skies with soft warm breezes. Wishing you only the best.
Deborah